You look Exactly Like My Best Friend

Yeah...

Wed, 16 Mar 2005 07:04:47 GMT

my parking break broke today. i saw a co talk today...twice, my mom even got his email. she is gonna try to get him sponsered to talk in ann arbor, since my aunt is like big stuff over there. and i got mistaken for some black lady who has my exact name Shoshana Cohen, who is a producer for kpfk...i think.

ouch

Sun, 06 Mar 2005 04:03:51 GMT

I just got my nose pierced today, and it hurt. I think it looks kinda weird and i'm not sure about it. This shit takes two months to heal, then i will be able to change this whack ass stud. Do they make then flatter?
I dont know how to end this post, so the end.

OMG

Wed, 02 Mar 2005 07:24:08 GMT

the other day my cat was sitting on me and and farted really loud! i never knew kitty farts could be loud...good thing it didnt smell.

shakes head

Tue, 22 Feb 2005 04:04:35 GMT

American Idol just got 100 times more gay.

WTF!

Wed, 16 Feb 2005 02:24:06 GMT

SO , my friend was telling me that her co-worker called me a DYKE! WTF, he also proceeded to say that he saw me check out like 5 girls, WTF me, check people out? i never do that. Plus Sarah was there, im wondering did he see her, did it not register that she more of a dyke then I? I just cannot believe this, someone called me a dyke! I was not wearing flannel or anything!

Well, whatever.

Happy Valentines Day Everyone!

Mon, 14 Feb 2005 21:00:10 GMT

Wishing you guys the best!

Do you remeber

Fri, 11 Feb 2005 08:08:34 GMT

Sealab 2021, well i got the dvd from netflix and it brought back good memories from hs. My fav episode is the "black debbie" one, it then reminded me of a black debbie i went to hs with. On that note i was told once by a friend of hers that up until the 6th grade she was bald, she now works at VONS. VONS, the word strikes me as Armenian i do not know why?!
Well the other day i went to the Abby for the first time, the food was good, the service was bad....thats cuse they had no waiters! WTF?!!! Well as i was sitting a my table this guy(sitting at another table across from me) was with some friends and inviting old asian guy who waled by to sit with them, he then proceeded to buy him drinks. So a little later this guy's (and did i mention he was older, and german and flaming) BF comes in and starts screaming that his BF was here and how he's his and everyone stay the hell away from his BF (and mind you he is telling the whole restaurant) he then starts to like have sex with him on the table. Well things got weird cuse the asian guy got up and left, well there gose his gerMAN fantacy.
Today I got a shirt that says C is for CRUNK christina are you hearing this........CRUNK!
its funny cuse i tried to use it in a sentence (like a few days ago) and it was so odd, i then was schooled in its proper use and its definition by some black girl who is almost as white as me.

Karma or Not?

Fri, 04 Feb 2005 22:12:50 GMT

So yesterday my mom says you missed the excitement around here. So she goes on to say that the lady who lives across the drive way has been missing for 6 WEEKS! im thinking how weird is that, but she totally had i coming cuse she is a bitch. I was pulling out of my garage and she just started honking at me to hurry up( look ho bag im pulling out as fast as i can). Well im always telling sarah how she is all alone and she is either gonna die alone in all her filth or kill herself. Well im thinking oh shit, i put some bad shit out there and now it totally happened. The police and the firemen came and crawled through the bathroom window that was open but didnt find anyone and the phone was off the hook too. Well, today i go into the bathroom and hear ppl. talking out side and its the missing lady, WTF!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!? this ho is crazy, some guy was like your alive! She didnt even know what happened she said that all her friends knew that she had been home and stuff, but get this her friend (i think its her only friend)called the police. The police called her work and they were like she hasnt been in for 6 weeks!

This is REALLY WEIRD AND THIS HO IS CRAZY!

Also if it takes ppl like 6 weeks to say somthing/realizes that your gone you must be so forgettable.

So sad.

p.s i also found out that they turned the water without telling anyone! man i gtg to work!

Fri, 04 Feb 2005 06:44:40 GMT

I just finished updating my uc application. This makes me happy and stressed. I also gave my oral presentaion in class today this makes me really relaxed since it was such a stress.
Last night i almost starting crying becuse i got lost in south pasadena, and you all know how i hate south pas! Also, i came up with a new name for south pas, its now called "south waisa" becuse its full of whites and asians. this also makes me smile. waisa HA!

Tue, 01 Feb 2005 09:26:39 GMT

Um, so the other day i was introduced to my space, now if you have it you need to add me, and if you dont you need to get it and then i'll add you! just type in my name or email or whatever. Ariel im looking at you, i think you need my space and you should read my profile cuse its really funny
me=black(squared)

Mon, 31 Jan 2005 20:15:13 GMT

Im sitting in the PCC library using the WIRELESS internet on my own computer. Who knew that pcc was so advanced! I am in a secret room, well actually its a study room but it feels really secret and private.
Last night i ate FU (as in the first syllable in fuck) yeah its a vietnamese noodle, kinda like raman but better. It came in soup form, it was ok, the broth was a little sweet for me, but the milk tea boba was off the hook!! im really going through a boba phase right now. Another phase im going through is sinabun(dont you like how i spelled it like SIN?) kelly works there and they had everything free night and it was fabulous!

indecent exposure

Fri, 04 Jun 2004 03:57:21 GMT

so the other day i wore a tube top to school with no bra. as i was walking down the stairs i was snapping the buttons off the shirt i was waring over the tube top and all of a sudden my boobs pop out of the shirt. first one came out and then the other SO EMBARRASSED!

Terrorisim at PCC

Fri, 28 May 2004 01:46:21 GMT

So today i innocently walk into my sex class, and 15 minutes in to the lecture a man walks in. The TA stops talking since this man was a police officer, and i do believe it wasen't the PCC police, but i don't know. So he says can "has anyone seen a package" and people are like "nope" and then he says "can everyone look under their seats, and see if they see one" we are all like "oh my god its a fucking bomb" and then we find out that it should be the size of a brief case. Well im like this is great im gonna blow up at fucking PCC while learning about Anorexia Nervosa! So they evacuate the whole fucking class room, and this is one with like over 100 people, while these people look for the package, they even checked the trash can. Well it turns out that there was no package in the room or at least of what we could see. It was really nerve racking and i always thought all those people over reacting to terrorist threats and shit, but know i totally know the feeling and its pure panic and adrenalin, its like who the fuck would bomb PCC? I just find it odd that this happened the day after the Ridge announced that there will be a terrorist attack in the summer. well whatever
long story short, i could of died today, but i didn't.

Sugar Daady

Sat, 22 May 2004 07:10:58 GMT

Ah, so i went and saw hedwig tonight, the play, on stage. It was really great, oh the best part was i got to go for free. There was a live band and the guy who played Hedwig was really good, and funny. OH SHIT, the guy who played tommy was soooooooo gay it was hilarious, did i mention this theater was in west hollywood, thats why it was so funny. Well i got a new bed and new sheets and new carpet, and new tile and i start a new job tomorrow at the pasaeo, its a place called JALOUX, fancy i know.

Cake or Pie –good eating by any name

Sun, 16 May 2004 22:30:04 GMT

well my hormones are way out of wak, i cried during Speed. No, i CRIED DURING SPEED!!!!!!!!. SPEED, this is very sad.

Dont be rapein'

Tue, 11 May 2004 19:00:23 GMT

is that how you spell that?

today i had an interview and i got the job on the spot! its really amezing it was in like a 20 minute period.

Rosie o donnal looks like horatio sands(from snl)...is that weird?

We are really in the shit whole in iraq, now they are beheading soldiers and sending us the tapes, we really had it coming. OH wait its just al kada, oh wait its in revenge of the iraqi abuse!

Singing cowboys are really cool. There is a whole exhibit dedicated to them at Gene Autry, oh wait, he's a singing cowboy! Now this makes sense.

its been a very long time

Sat, 01 May 2004 19:34:22 GMT

so i have 2 really funny stories

1) Sarah and i went to old navy so she could get khaki pants for work. We looked and looked but they had none that fit her right because they were all to long. Since they had such a limited selection of pants we tried the CAPRI'S, yes, sarah is short enough to were capri's as pants. This really was some funny stuff. It looked as if she had no knees and funny enough like a midget. I now call her capri.

2) Sarah and I were telling eachother were we never would want to work, and I said hooters. Sarah went on to say "you could get a job at hooters....if you had big boobs....if you had a personality....if you weren't tall and black"
Way to boost my self esteem!

ahhhhhhhh

Fri, 16 Apr 2004 05:28:22 GMT

so my last post i never got to finnish cuse sarah is crazys and the dykes (including myself, at the moment) were getting into a big fight about people getting cancer and how i use tampons. YA, i know tampons are really great, but no one knows the long term effects from it though. Well so im home now and my feet really hurt. I'm like an old person dont really do much, like me and sarah stayed in san fran for a day and a half, seriously. we were like fuck paying 5 bucks to go to sacolito and we are going to lose are bomb ass parking spot? no the fuck way! oh and like we are gonna go back to oakland to hang out and THEN PAY 2 BUCKS TO GO BACK TO SF, no the fuck way!!!!!!
SF tries to rip you off, i hate that shit. so we would of loved to stay longer but everyone was in school and if we had stayed in oakland one of our friends would of got really pissed off if she had seen us hanging out with another friend or even talk to her!!!!! so chose not to get into it by not staying there.
wait so what was so cool are outlets, i got some stuff. yet, now my feet hurt and i'm resting with my sick kitty. She is always getting sick
gto, i get to see who won the apprentice....hope its kwame
p.s wendy's is really good

wtf?

Tue, 13 Apr 2004 07:53:03 GMT

so driving in san fran is a bitch! people here do not know how to drive, and whats up with the buses taking up 2 lanes and they get to have their own lane. Union square is big and there are alot of crazys there. parking is hard to find but a man with fucked up teeth helped us find a parking structure or to him, a parking garage. we found it after running into a lot of one way streets. Oh so im staying in the # 3 most dangrous neirbrohood in the city how fun and i have the BEST PARKING SPOT! i went to castro tonnight and i hated the resturant we went to ...there was a hair.

riding horses really hurts

Mon, 29 Mar 2004 03:22:02 GMT

So today was great! for the first time i really went horse back riding (the time in mexico doesn't count) and now my butt really hurts. its my butt but the inside of my butt. Yeah, my horse was a little weird, at first he went really slow and then he would run really fast at one point he just booked it and i almost fell off. at this point my ass had welts on it. then my mom told me to jump with the horse and then my ass felt the touch of god. Well any ways i think my horse got tired/old because pilot would stop to eat and drink out of the ponds. It was really funny cuse we would be at the end and then he would run past everyone and then slow way the fuck down--it was great! So i really want to do this again it was fun, and it was only 18 dollars.
oh yeah, pilot kept walking into the bushes so i would get scratched and he started ot trip alot.:(

poor amber

Fri, 19 Mar 2004 19:04:13 GMT

im so sad my kitty is sick, she's coughing and sneezing....lets hope fartings not next.

recycling

Thu, 18 Mar 2004 03:28:11 GMT

so today i recycled and got a whopping 1.92 cents, this is really great. i saved up like 25 bottels! and thats all i got, but hey aat least its somthing. pcc is weird cuse you always run into people ya know. like today i ran into three in 5 minute period. and i also flunked a test and lost 10 hw points cuse my teacher is a bitch. Oh how i hate her.

the passion

Mon, 15 Mar 2004 09:07:50 GMT

well, mel gibson is a crazy mo-fo, i found out that this story of christ he used was one not from jonh, paul, luke or any of them but from some crazy lady who wasent even there (who really hated jewish people by the way) wrote the version he used for this movie. and one more thing it was necessary for jesus to die, so there would be the religion called christianity. so all the people who blame and cry about his death really need to chill out!
sorry, finding that this movie was a waste of time.

penis, vagina, penis, vagina...

Fri, 12 Mar 2004 01:42:29 GMT

Today, i learned some very interesting things about the human body. one being if you smoke and your a guy then your erection wont be a hard. is'nt that weird. I also learned that doctors will slit the perineum when the introitus has not opend far enough with out consulting. this slitting may result in fisstula, the realesing of bodily fuliuds with out control. when i heard this my vagina started to hurt. this hurting only increased because we started to talk about female cricumsision. this happens at the age of seven and may also result in fisstula, in which they become throw-aways because they are always shitting and peeing themselves. oh and after the married female gives birth they sew her introitus up again to keep her nice and tight. I hate men. oh ya we had to draw penises and vaginas today and color them. I had to draw the penis and i didnt know if i was doing it right and i only had 3 pictures to work with and they were all like an inch. I colored it green. i made the vaginas purple.

oops i did it again

Tue, 09 Mar 2004 07:12:55 GMT

I am the queen of colds! so i am now sick and its getting worse by the minute. it sucks cuse i cant just stay home like in HS. Well i didnt feel as bad cuse i ran into ariel and she gave me her un-used dayquill. THANKs ariel i really love you!!!!!!!!! it did make me a little sleppy or that could be due to just being sick. Oh and a few days ago i was in debt to the bank cuse i kept on bouncing and it made me sad. now sarahs bouncing but her bank keeps on charging!!!! DOWN WITH WELLS FARGO, UP WITH WA MU!
P.S FREE FUCKING MARTHA STEWART!!!!!
and lets put an end to female circumcision!